beautiful windy rainy

thanks God you already give me the best friend like i have now..

amoy with many talent you give and Dy the best shoulder you sent too....

we got print to senen for calender Sekolah Minggu.... we go at 7 pm and everyboday come to my house...

and, on our way we talk so many things... dy ask me about rumah serpong... and we talk many things that amoy being our connection. hahahhaa.... sometimes amoy looks so funny and make we laugh... and amoy forget about the way to print location....

and, we arrived i got headache because so crowed! so many things them ask to me..

ahh.. bless me i have amoy that know everything.. and we got pay for setting! ahh.. this is the hardest thing i dont know. we must pay for setting bolak balik and he told thats layout not setting! i dont know whats the different of setting and layout... and we count and count.. Dy make me calm down and thinking.. "cingcailah"

ahh.. so bless there is amoy and Dy go with me.. amoy know about printing and Dy make me calm down and learn more and more... and we waiting for the file ready to print, and waiting for acc print...

when we waiting the acc print dy phoned with Mei.. i think mei ask "dmna, kok blm plng" dy just answered " ini nunggu printan acc nya belom keluar"

sometimes Dy's mobile ringing...  and after acc print out we check and check, for the bolak balik id good just miss 1 mili and we handle it..

and after that, we go home with heavy rainy day! dy drove so slowly and make we safety.... and he dont know about the way to home.. hehehehe... i told him the direction..

and on our way. we got windy rainy.. thats make dy drove more slowly... on traffic lamp there is child i want give them biscuit and i not found it. and dy give 2000 and he said 'tuh noceng buat beli biskuit" and after he gave, i found the biscuit and dy eat it.. i know he hungry... because he not yet eat. when he pick up me i ask for dinner and he dont want... he said he still full because he got late lunch. he from Serpong... *he buy house at serpong huh? can we being neighbor? because i see serpong keys on his car...

while he drove i hold the biscuit and he said "lah, jadi dipegangin terus"

and we got stuck in front of BCA because he not dare through the flood... after we dare, dy confused how to go home... and papi said "masuk dulu" and papi give for drive avanza... hahahha... and after he thinking he agree for drive avanza, and he leave Freed in my home..

and, the more bless for me is, in the morning he message me ask about flood and make me awake! ahh... thanks so much! maybe i will still sleep if you not message me..

oh God, im so bless to have friends like them.... friend to help each other and support each other...

thanks God for windy rainy you give... i know you have many way to make us closer and far....

sometimes you make us closer and sometimes you make me cry because you make us far... i dont know what You have plan to us... for next year its really grey plan to me...

i hope what i see in Dy's car i true... the serpong key! i hope thats your house you build for your new life after married.... i dont know, when i got stuck in some problem God sent you for help me.. and its the way of God to help me when i move to serpong? you always ask me when i move to serpong...

ahh... still hope that we can being neighbor at serpong.. but, i dont know, what will happen...

thanks God for what had happen in my life!

Wonderful Christmas

Its very wonderful Christmas i have!!
Thanks God for give me the best gift for this Christmas, eventhough we not coma to same chapel on christmas eve. But we have wonderful time in Christmas time...

Begins from sunday school... I ask reni next week he come or not and she said not. And Dy ask me "lah kmren ditnya dteng apa enggak lu bilng dteng." and the next question is " lu di serpong skrng?" i dont know why he ask me that and i said "gak. Cman mungkin pas 31 nya ke serpong." "gw mah kmpl rumah leo kyknya.."

And next story is... I ask him to help me and amoy to print for calendar. I need transportation. Ahhh.... I realy love this Christmas!!! He waiting me while i got discuss with amoy. And he meet sunday school children for a while and i got code to him to eat batagor!! And we go down together....

And he treat me the batagor... And i buy orange juice and i give to reni... And after we finish our batagor he will go home.... And i got chit chat with ka indri abou my THR and ka indri told me... And, Dy wait me..

Ahhh... So wonderful Christmas gift i have! The moment i have.... I will remember it..

Wonderful time i have, wonderful gift i have, wonderful best friend as my shoulder i have! You always know what i want,you always know what in my mind.. You know my feel...

Thanks God in Christmas time i may feel more bless from my best shoulder...

last christmas

last christmas i gave you my heart...
thats not only song for every christmas..
but for this christmas is for my last christmas with my best shoulder.....

i dreamt him again.. with good condition. i hope in reality is same with what i was dream it! our togetherness, our relation....

i gonna miss our christmas eve!

is today our last christmas? i gonna miss it for next christmas eve....

in my dream so clear that you so closed to me.. in bus, you help me and we got discussion. you told me about the direction. and we got discuss about go or not go to that event. you looking for the companion. and i want go to somewhere place. finally, he looking for someone to come and use that ticket his had, and Dy companion me to go somewhere...

ahh.. so nice story i had in my dream... but, im so afraid to looking the reality.... usually what i was dream is very different with the fact...

i hope my last christmas is going well.. i gonna miss it.. i gonna cry for my last christmas....

our next christmas it will not same with this year, isn't it?

next christmas eve, maybe you will already being husband and we will celebrated together with mei as your wife. last year we celebrate christmas eve together with mei too... today? our last christmas eve.... it will be same like last year? or we will celebrate by ourselves....

Last Christmas
I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year
To save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

-our last christmas eve-

this is the way....

ahhh...

i just realized that maybe this is the way of God to make me forget about my best shoulder!
my family plan to move to serpong, and now dy's office move to tanjung duren, near my houese now....

aahhh...

if, my family move to serpong last year, maye i and Dy can be closer, can dinner and lunch together, can watch movie  together... because his office on serpong... now, if i move to serpong, it will be far away....

sometimes, i realized that is God's way for i forget him.. sometimes i'm sad, but sometimes i happy because with this way make me learn to stand on of my own feet....

i hope with this condition i can learn much for my life.. not depend of Dy anymore... on nest year i must learn.. at least i have one year to learn it. until Dy's big day.. i wanna give the best part of my life to make your ur day beautiful....

i pray for ur preparation, everything you and mei discuss... hope everything is going well till the day...

keep your spirit Dy.. hope mei can teaching sunday school like you.. if yes.. i will thinking again about my master.. :)

take it or leave it!

sometimes i dont know what i like in, but sometimes i really excited with something i like...


surely  i dont know what would take...


but, in my vacillation i can choose what i want...
what i interest in... 
i know make a new business is not easy. but, surely i want make it! 
i take a risk not go study aboard... even thats my dream from my junior high school... i can't leave what i love... i must learn and i must can stand on my own feet... even though sometimes i would shared to my best shoulder what my confused, but beside that i must learn to make my own decision... i know, it's not easy.. but, if there is good time i would shared to Dy what my dream..  in my mind if i told Dy what of my confuse Dy will say " ya, buat apa lu blajar 3d gtu" "trus yg nerusin usaha bokap sapa?" i dont know what i must answer it.. 


oh God, what i should do, what i must take and leave it... my dream or what i love in.. sunday school, friends.... mostly my best shoulder i had!

elementary reunion!

okeyy.. its time to back to time when we was child...

so great because i can met with my elementary school mate... first time roy invited me to join this reunion. but, i dont know i can go or not..
at the day i was "galau".. so i came so late and i saw roy, pipi, aland, itak, sukris, erika, endrico..

yaa.. even though just make laughing, i really dont know what this purpose.. and afte i came to CP at domino, we move to babon's resto at sunrise...

and one by one come, i try to remember who are they... there are giovani, ryan... ahh.. i remember when they child...

and i ask aland about darwin... he leave the univ... not drop out... i know recently... and, now he help his parents at toko kertas... and li ask again about the house, and aland said he already move.. but, i dont ask him again where he move...

ahh... if there i darwin at reunion.. how are you now.. how ur life! i remember i give you tie! because you want being businessman! now, did you make it happen? you leave your dream... i dont know what ur parents feels.... but, i hope everything will be okey..

i dont know what should i ask or what should i say if we met someday later.. about ur life? about ur job? or else? you disappear after we Ujian Nasional. on graduation day you not come..  i really dont know what you thinking was... but i hope one day we met you will be a good man....

ahh.. roy, never change from last time we met. elementary. when i came back, roy ride me until taman ratu.. he ask me "sejak kapan nyetir"
hahhahaha...

ahh... our elementary never change....

ahh one thing i remember is gio remember who am i.. amaze.... hope someday we can meet again with more friends can join....

and i hope one day we reunion there is darwin... so i can ask him so many question that i want ask to him.. when i ask to aland about darwin, he ask me ' kenapa, kangen ya..."

ohh.. i just keep my smile to aland.. i dont know what i feel yest... i just want ask everything about darwin... and everyone knows well about darwin.. ahh... i miss my high school moment.. when i help him to study, doing his work... learn play card... going to singkawang mostly.. i miss it!! time when we to together... time i remember him about test, task, and many else...

i know he is very laszy, but i jut wanna help him to being a good man... not being lazy man... but, i think its all nothing to him.. i know he closer to enjel not to me.. i hope what i had did to him i make him learn how meaningful of life....

if someday i meet him, i wanna say. i felicia the success woman. not in money but in love!

ahh... if there is time to meet.... i wanna say keep in faith Win!

origami again!

sunday is always make me happy.. every sunday i will smile and smile again....

this is the several times that Dy not come to first chapel, i dont know why he not come to the first chapel again... i think he already wake up early.. because Dy not wake up late.. but, every morning has some thing happen...

okey, but what i learn is now Dy not come too late for teaching sunday school... today i got MC at sunday school and after we sing one song Dy come bring one plain paper ... i dont know what id function is....

and we still sing a song...

today, we got blood war from my sunday school child... first daniel got mimisan and we got handle him while ka novi story telling.. and after that, Dy explain  me about christmas tree origami that Dy watch from youtube at this morning. and he greatest is he remember how to make it.. he explain me so careful... with my weird face... hahahhaa.....

while Dy explain the children, one of our child said to Dy
"ko, gigiku putus"
" hah?"

and Dy ask me to handle it....

waaa..... this week we had problem with blood and 2 weeks a go we got trouble with water...
hahhaaa... what wonderful sunday school i have! i love it!

because i love it, it's too hard to leave it....

and after sunday school, he looking the other origami. pinguin. so, he learn and make it. and Done! while i teach amoy about illustrator. and we got persiapan... before we persiapan.. at classroom leave me and dy and i told him about ocel's question.. about ka novita.

i told him that ocel ask me, perpanjng ka novita apa enggak. i told him every detail what i answer to ocel.
" si ocel nanya sama gw perpanjng ka novita apa enggak"
"trus?"
"ya klo felis sih blng enggak. soalnya ya begitu2 aja.. skolah minggu kita ada pembaharuan..."
"hooo"
"lgian skrng dia udh kerja"
"oh ya.. kerja dimna?"
" di yg penabur itu..."

hoo.. and then we got persiapan...

after persiapan finished... we got together prayer... and i pray for Dy.. he want pray about, kesehatan, pekerjaan, isa Tuhan taon depan married, keluarga...

and he still make origami... fish... and i make too with the weird face again and he help me to make it..

ahh.. about lunch! i give him 3/4 my rice.. and he got angry.... " ahh gila lu!!" and i just smilee... hehehe....

i know he care about me, i know he still know my illness, i know he know about my condition...

and he help me to bring ginger house that KJB made.. and after that i go home... through Dy's car that parking at kartika.. and i give horn to him....

ahh... blessing sunday.. blessing origami... blessing day!1 blessing friend like him...

i never forget....

" Ah.. gila lu..."

-smile-

i know he worried about me, i know he know my condition....



and i just make deal to make my own company... hope everything will well done what i had made...

countdown of xmas!

count down of xmas!!!
so excited !!!

i dont know what i excited of for waiting the christmas, but, i really wait for the xmas time...
time to happy, time to changing....

surely, im so excited...

time to meet with old friends...
 our elementary mate, junior high school mate... so many schedule that we has made for xmas time.. we will catch up with the other... but, i dont know what had change in my life.. i just being myself.. just ordinary...

ahhh....

can't wait for xmas time....

what should i say to my old friends if we meet? who am i know? im felicia like last you know.. dont have ability looks strong in my life. but, one things i want say.. i love being my self.. i love my life.. my service!!!

i dont have any talent i have like you are.. music, art, etc. but i love my life! i dont realize that you are love your life... hope, one day when we meet we are forget about what had happen in last time... especially my junior high school mate.. i dont know what i must talk with them. i never forget what one girl told to me. annoying whole my life. but, if we meet someday, i wanna say this is i am... the smart girl, the ordinary, the women who loves her life... but, time fly and we got good communication with others. people who ridicules me and now we got chit chat sometimes on facebook....

yahh.. this is life.. sometimes we on top, but sometimes we on under... time fly so fast, and people change as they want.. there 2 choise.. being a good person or bad person... i hope my junior high school mate change being good person... this is my pray.. so, if someday we meet we will know each other with positive side.... and we forget the bad time when we made on junior high school time...

i want that time... the best time in my life...

if one day i meet all of them i wanna say...

this is me! felicia who loves her life, her service in church and live her job being designer!!!

so if you looking designer please pick her, she  will give the best service to you as her client. no bad memory in her life!!

ahh....

can not wait for we meet time.. my mate.... i miss so much!!

ocha come back to indo for holiday and we got catch up with arini and others to..

my elementary mate just make schedule for we meet other. its roy's idea... i remember roy, sukris, fio, so much memory mate in elementary.... i can not wait for it!!1

xmas time.. please come faster.. so i can prepare for moving to new house. i can refresh my mind... i can got holiday...... ^_____^

getting marriage

wowww!!!!

everyone who closed to me is getting marriage!!!

Next year is the big year for me!!!

- my sis on March
- my cousin on April
- Eni on Oct
- and the last is Dy on end of year!!!

oh noo....

everyone getting marriage next year...
honestly, i cant leave the first and the last person on top....

not believe it that person i loved getting marriage as soon as possible...

on Eni's i help her on designing the invitation....

i can't wait for the big day of Dy.... i hope i can joint in your happiness day...

love next year..
i can't wait for next year....

folded folding

always more bless if Sunday coming!!
alone first chapel again... this Sunday Dy come with Mei again, last week Mei told me that she will come again...

more bless every Sunday, i dont know why i feel more bless in Sunday. i think because Dy near me.. hehehhe...

ok lets start the blessing on this Sunday...

amoy explain me about the activity for children. about folding... i just yes yes and yes.. hahahhaa... and moy said "ah, lu mah iya2 aja, ntr jug ujung2nya Hen..."

hahhaa...
what amoy said its true.... everything happened Dy always know... and the activity i will ask him..

and after a minutes Dy come with Mei... and i called him..

"Dy.... nih aktivitasnya.. susah bner..."
" yaudh lu yg jelasin kan?"

and Dy and Mei got read the direction...

whole Reni story telling, we try make it the star!

and we got stuck and Dy try and try and did it!

after that after we got explain to the children. Dy on right side, im on left side.. we did it together....  looks so nice and completed class with nice teacher...

and today i see Tatan's niece and nephew... Keira and Oliver... and one other i dont know the name... maybe Keira's sister...

after sunday school Dy and Mei go to tanjung duren to see their office renovation...


on Saturday. i got chit chat with fibi on CP she had fitness and i walk around and we got shared...
sometimes i miss time when high school... time when collage....

now, i being independent person. walk alone and survive by myself.

sure with what i like in, sure what i will take... sure with my self...

but, all of thats is God's plan....

i miss me time....

sweet dream

this is the several times i was dream about Dy.. today my dream is looks so real... the story not far from Sunday school... i dont want stop this dream if i can..

its start from Sunday school teacher gathering... i can't join the gathering from beginning.. i had something that i must did first, and after that i will join the gathering. the gathering is outside church its look in park. when i want come in to the park i just offer something with someone i dont know and i pay for something. i think thats a counter of ticketing. after i walk about some far, i just realize thats not counter of ticketing, and i come back to that counter for ask my money back and they give it.

after, i buy ticket i walk around and try to call Dy... but, when i called him i saw them. i think the gathering will finished but not yet, because everybody gather around. and the first person i greet its Dy. " tadi felis mo nelponin tpi kgk bsa" something conversation i told him. and we got go somewhere place when i came. 

the place looks like house. i dont know where is that place. and we got chit chat. when chit chat Dy want change the clothes and he talk to me... after Dy change it, he asking me for change the clothes. 

"felis kan gak bawa baju"

"itu ada baju yg item pake aja"

and i change the clothes with Dy's black t-shirt. everyone looks to us... 

i dont know what everybody thinking about us, but we was closed, caring each other... 

how sweet this dream, how nice the story was.

why i can't forget Dy... how i forget him in my life.. my best friend, my soulmate, my best shoulder....

he always around in my life. 

i never want stop this dream if i can... Sunday school, Dy... things i didn't want lost it... i don't know what happen if there are no all of its... maybe my life will empty, lonely...

can i find the other best shoulder? 

friend who can help me without words but his action,

friend who not ask me about the problem but he knows i'm in problem. 

friend who know i'm not fit although im try look fit and everybody trust me im fit.

friend who likes grumbling on me everytime

friend who can being my best place to discuss and shared everything happen 

friend who can teach and guide me

the last friend who can read what in my mind although im not telling....

friends are come and go, but best friend is always in heart!

dreaming Oliver

i dont know, why i must dreamt about oli and sunday school...

but, i just wanna say its beautiful dream i had!

first, Oli, in my dream.. i was closed with him.. my cute sunday school child.... and i was closed too with Ci sonya and ko andi... this situation is in sunday school. after sunday school i got play with oli and ci sonya come. ah.. when ci sonya come, oli got "pii" on me... just little.. hehehhe...

and after oli go home, there are new sunday school teacher join persiapan. i not clearly who are them.. but, when i saw from back, one of them looks like tatan... one of them i really dont know..

what the meaning of my dream?

people coma and go, its mean there will come new sunday school? or its time i say goodbye?

because when i got dream its not same with reality. the reality is reverse from what i was dream...

ohh.. God please help me to know what mean of my dream...

Oli, tatan, new sunday school teacher...

it's just Time... the best time to happen it all...

greatly weekend

weekend come time to leisure time...

this Saturday i got permit to my boss not come to office and i prepare for sis wedding find the fabric to some store. and after half day i got walk around and back to home. at afternoon we got test food.

little busy for this saturday...

after we got test food. on my way i message Dy for got story for i concer. and Dy said
" lagi di luar ni... nti ingetin lagi ya...."

after i arrive at home and waiting til nite. i msg him again... and he sent me..

Sunday morning...

his not come to first chapel and he come to sunday school with mei...

i and Mei got "bebong" because one of sunday school child got fall his mineral water bottle. and the floor getting wet of that...  Mei will come next week again!

at activity i and dy got discuss about the activity for decoration.... ahh... its really great sunday... and he got explain about the absent board.. after finished, mei got bakso goreng and offer me and reni... and Dy got phone from his mom and go down with mei, because mei not yet greet Dy's mom.... and Dy said " cman turun bntr"

and you know he come to upstair again to say goodbye... i dont know why he go upstairs again... why he didn't say goodbye when he go down with mei.. but, when dy come to upstair i got conversation with one of sunday school mom..

after i got concer, i had family lunch at serpong..

ohh.... busy weekend.... and there are so many weekend that i will through with the bust schedule....

very great of this weekend.

so tired, so great, so happy, so memory moment....

i always remember when i and mei got "bebong" she said for the first time "bebong"... hahahhahhahaa....