6 days left!!!

lalallaa.....

lilililliii...

i dont know what i feel now.. hmm.. just count for my last day....

6 days left!!!!

huuuuaaa...

so excited.. so happy, confused, every emotion combining to be one.. hmm... campur adukk...

and i so excited to wait the bible camp.. ohhh.... it my last day is going fast.. please..... time come faster.. and be slow when bible hold ... because on that time i can near and make closer with dy.. sometimes i want share what i had decision.. like what dy said... " yudah bonyok lu tinggal dmana, lu dmana gtu.. susah bnget.." and.... now.. it will be happen in my life dy... you always now what had happen in my life... and the best for my life.. but, i must move on from him.. i know it.. but, i know too its so hard to did that....

sharing again.. on first sunday of june

this sunday my mom and emak go to vietnam and we drop them to airport. wake up at 2 am.. still dizzling.. after we back to home we sleep again.. hahaha.. and i wake up at 5 and go to first chapel..really sleepy when the chapel is going... and i sit alone.. after that, i waiting the sunday school time.. and amazing that dy come early.. not like usual he come late.. hahaha... and he asking who storry telling? 

after sunday school, pra remaja had bazaar and i go down lo see it.. and i interest with that bakmi.. hmm... dy go down first i dont lnow what had happen because he had called till out beside his car, and looks seriously with his dad... and i buy the bakmi..  after dy finished his phone, we walk together and he met AL so he talk with him and i leave it.. i eat alone.. and i not finished.. and dy just got the bakmi from his mom... and he eat while he talk with leo and manda... i want give my half bakmi.. but i dont have a dare to sharing it.. and at one moment, i said to him "angkat ko soni" and i talk to him.. 

"mau gak?" 

"makanlah.. masih banyak... mkan dulu aja.. nih, lu kalo mkan sama dia pesen nasi aja.. lauknya nanti dari dia.." 

"tadi kan bnyak banget.. gak abis.." 

" tau gtu gw gak usah beli tadi..."

hahahha... and leo and manda laughing together...

and we go to persiapan... and he leave first because from the morning i got flu... and he looks not fit. and he leave it... 

i dont know, why im very happy.. every i sharing food with him, it looks im a little girl.. and on lunch i said "yahh.. temen sharing gw gak ada..." hahaha... 

i really love what had happen in sunday.. and i love sunday so much... when sunday come, i want it walk slowly than the other day.. i want more and more near by best sharing partner... i know sometimes i felt that what i did is wrong.. i must not near to dy, because soon he will can not near to me again..but, God, at least i can enjoy my life sharing with them before that day.. i really love it..

and maybe dy and mei had commitment to come to evening chapel, because they had some weeks on evening chapel.. ahh.... can i walk together whole my life? i love sharing time.. i love discussion time, i love caring time.. and i always love when we had together time... 

first june

finally... june comes so fast... and i will resign from this company.. and i already told to the boss why i want quit from this company... feel free now.. and everything had happened just like nothing anymore... please be nice june for me... please end of june come faster.. i will quit and i will spend 2 nights with my best shoulder... i hope when retreat come i will fit.. because now i'm so excited waiting the end of june...

after i told to the boss why im quit... hmm.. i feel free and just waiting the time for last day... but, im so bless because i can be part of hawacomm.. i can learn many things in here, i can learn to control my emotion, control my time.. and im feel like a professional designer... but, i feel when im working my time is gone.. i dont have time again with my friends.. some appointment i cancel because i got overtime.. like i must go to dentist and i cancel it because i got overtime.. other time i must go to church and im late because after im back from client office i had overtime again.. hmm.. just nice overtime i had...

sometimes i love when im being seriously working, but sometimes i really bored with this condition.. i want being freelancer.. i can arrange the client time, and of course with me time... i love when i had me time.. i love when im being free.... can everything going well like i dream? can everything i through and i being strong woman like i want be? can i not told everything again to dy? when im quit i told him.. ooohhh... nooo.....can i? can i being dependent woman?

count weeks and days from im quit.. 28 june.. please come faster... and please be slow when bible camp on held.. it our last time togetherness? it our last time before you getting marriage? iis it a last time you care to me? i will miss your grumble, i will  miss when you take care me while grumbling... i will miss time when you drive me safely.. i will miss time when i treat you batagor.. can it will be same like now when you already marriage? can we still together as friend. as a best friend. as a best shoulder. can you give you warm hug when im crying? can you still on my side when im alone? i dont realize that i must do that...

please june be nice for me.. please be nice to hawacomm too.. please be nice to sunday school too when everything will going on... please God lead every way took.. please being my best leader. showing me the best way, hold my hand when i lost my way.. please be nice for every people closed to me...

june.. i will miss it.. count days.. and im very excited.. i know i may not being so excited.. because when im so excited my illness will come to me....